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On appearances: MICHAEL HURWITZ spent six years in Shanghai doing the little things to help bridge the cultural and linguistic gap between China and the West.

Now back in the United States studying business and Chinese, Michael enjoys reggae music, his hometown basketball team the Washington Wizards, and has a handful of tattoos he'd rather not explain.

In fact, I once dated a girl who would only meet up at places that her parents AND grandmother had pre-approved; as you can imagine none of these places were very fun.

Your lady’s generation may well be the first to have that freedom of romantic choice, and that's something you need to keep in mind while making your decisions for your relationship – there simply isn't a ton of cultural precedent for her to fall back on.

Altogether, the cultural emphasis on marrying early, particularly for women, means that dating is imbued with a lot more meaning and isn’t something to be taken lightly.

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While this isn’t really the way most Chinese meet their future spouses anymore, marriage markets are still a fairly common sight, even in more Westernized cities like Shanghai.This goes back to less stable times, when marriage meant much-needed security, but of course this is by no means a purely Chinese phenomenon: In 2010, 44% of American women had , but way way back in 1995, more than 59% had been hitched by 25.China is relatively new to the whole modern-stable-globalized-internet (still working on that last one, really) country thing, and when your culture is over 4,000 years in the making, old habits die hard.Consider, too, the generational issue at play here: The lovely lady you’ve been crushing on’s parents and grandparents are the ones exerting that pressure to get married, even though she herself may not feel that she’s ready or interested.That's because her grandparents' and possibly (depending on where in China she is from) her parents still value marital stability above all else in their time, given the instability and volatility of their eras.

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