"See, the problem with Opie and Anthony—where both of those guys struggled—is that they were married to each other. You can't just talk off-the-cuff onstage in front of a live audience.They were so used to bouncing off another person that when they split up, they're both standing there like satellites saying, 'Okay, now what? Sometimes a crowd is like, 'How come he's different onstage than when he's on the radio? There's no way you can talk for that many hours a day and be that loose on stage.Which, frankly, sounds like the a boring Faustian bargain, but is one all the same: He will have a career pushing the envelope in standup and calling out society on every little hypocrisy he notices, and in exchange he will give up any possible fun. But also no cake or rich food, and yes to gallons of green juice.No to smoking, yes to seeing a personal trainer daily.
After a while, one realizes it's this kind of rigorous self-discipline that has defined the various contours of his personality, his work, and—because his career is built on analyzing himself and then talking about it—his entire life. "It's messed me up, really, just through social networking, talking to women," he says. This one girl I met on an app, we were talking a lot, and she never got back to me when I asked for her number.
One detail that always comes up when he tells this story is that, by attempting suicide, he ruined his chances for being deemed "Class Clown"—but the picture would look weird anyways, with his bandaged wrists and all.
Norton's early stint in rehab was the turning point when he first got sober and learned the power of self-discipline.
At the first commercial break he will devour the food, shoveling it down before they go back on the air; but for now he ignores it.
"We're all like, 'Can Coughlin still run the Giants? They're fucking is Anthony Cumia, who was fired in 2014 after a racist Twitter tirade against a black woman who had allegedly assaulted him for taking pictures of her in Times Square. And I will not, in the divorce, say that I'm going to live with one or the other.