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The believer should not pursue a divorce from an unbeliever, but if the unbeliever wants out of the marriage, the believer should not contest this, and the believer would then be free to remarry.
The two grounds for remarriage, then, would be a divorce that involved sexual immorality, and a divorce initiated by an unbeliever.
I would agree that the engagement was taken so seriously it had to be broken as though it were a marriage.
I think all Christians would agree that God's ideal for marriage is "one man and one woman, living together in marriage until parted by death." We see this emphasized by our Lord in Matthew 19:3-12.
As strict as the Pharisees were, they believed that divorce was permissible.
They had made the exception (there can be divorce, when there is sexual immorality) to be the rule (there can be divorce for any reason at all).
Divorce was so rampant that Jesus wanted them to see that God was not permissive about divorce.